Memories
by SulfurHeart
Summary: Random RP ideas / Characters Used: Hisoka, Kenshin (disclaimer: I do NOT own these characters) / OC's Used: Kadory, Kyrro, Sarai
1. Setsuko & Tatsuo

[ **Memory: **Setsuko and Tatsuo, before Kadory ]

Life had always been relatively peaceful there. Of course, angry and judgmental men would come and attack their small village of 30 people, but the nekos always had a way of getting their act together and working as a fully-functional team. Even the young boys, who had not yet come of age, helped keep their enemies at bay by throwing rocks or using bow-and-arrows. Life had always been particularly peaceful for Setsuko. The young woman had always been there to help when their rivals came into their village, but had, afterwards, gone home to do chores for her aging parents. She never once complained, nor argued, though she had an inner fire that she kept hidden from everyone else. She was the spitting image of her mother in her youth, both looks and personality. Long, black hair with shining brown eyes and tanned skin, just below average height, and for what she lacked in height she made up for in spunk.

However, the young woman was full of herself. Despite this, Setsuko had many suitors, all of which had given up on her due to her selfishness and her fiery attitude. Plus, she'd made it quite clear that she'd had no interest in any of the men. Everything changed, however, when one neko male refused to give up on her. Tall, brown hair, gorgeous blue eyes. He was sweet, caring, and Setsuko began to fight alongside him when the outsiders attacked. They began to spar with each other to pass the time, and Setsuko rarely lost, but when she did it was astounding how badly she lost. And slowly, Setsuko changed. With someone else to care for outside her family relations she began to realize she was not the only one in the world who had needs. And slowly, _very_ slowly, she fell in love.

Despite things he'd heard about her, Tatsuo refused to give up on her. His mindset of "everyone has a light side" was probably the only thing that kept him at it. She definitely was beautiful, but she was very much like a rose: she had her thorns, for sure. Perhaps more thorns than the other neko women in the village. They soon became the best of friends, and there was nothing they did that they didn't do together. And all throughout their relationship, Tatsuo's status as the tribe leaders' only and oldest son, and only heir, was kept at the back of their minds. She was the only one who had the nerve to say whatever she wished to his face, despite him being the tribe heir. After all, he [i]was[/i] the only son…though he did have six other, younger sisters.

It took two years for their relationship to fully blossom and three more years after that for Tatsuo to finally decide to marry the transformed Setsuko. She was no longer the self-centered, arrogant 20-year-old she'd been when they had first met, though she still had her untamable fire inside her. And three years into their marriage, the two tribe leaders had a child: a daughter whom they named Kadory. It was obvious Setsuko was meant to be a mother: she had every instinct of a mother who had been a mother for years. Kadory was being raised in a (somewhat) perfect environment and home. But happiness doesn't last, and nobody can live forever.


	2. Sarai & Kadory

[ Sarai and Kadory memory ]

"_I'll never grow up!" Kadory said proudly, one fist raised in the air, index finger extended. "I'll be little forever and I won't grow old and die!" _

_The elderly woman looked down on her adopted-daughter with soft green eyes, pepper-colored hair falling into her face, "That's all right with me, Kadory," she said sweetly, "You can stay my little princess forever. And even if you _do_ grow old, you'll always be my beautiful baby girl." The young neko looked up at her foster-mother, bicolored eyes shining brightly, somewhat with amusement, somewhat with a strong trust that her mother's words would come true. _

"_Okay, Mum," she said, "I'll be your little princess forever!"_

Sarai remembered that fondly. Kadory, being a younger girl, about five years of age at the time, had the imagination Sarai could never have attained, even when _she_ was a young girl. Kadory had seen the glass half full, and had done relatively well with ignoring the criticism she got from the other, 'normal' people. Of course, innocence doesn't last forever. However, when Kadory was younger, she was always so bright and happy, laughing and smiling with her shining dual-colored eyes. She really was a rare beauty, with one brown eye, and one blue one, silky, long black hair, and the black ears of a cat. Though most people hated her for her differences, Sarai thought Kadory was the most beautiful little child she'd ever seen—exception of her own children, whom had been taken by cholera some years before.

Sarai frowned, holding the side of the door, looking out, wondering where her adopted daughter had gone off to. Perhaps she was trying to hunt again, bring home another kill of meat to eat instead of their regular water-and-cabbage 'soup.' Sighing, Sarai stepped outside, inspecting her surroundings before turning her eyes up to the azure sky, picking out random shapes in the fluffy white clouds. Sarai turned her head when she heard footsteps, her green eyes landing on her daughter, carrying a fowl in one of her hands, smiling.

_Smiling?_ Sarai asked herself mentally, _Why smile, my dear, when we all know your smiles are fake? Why can you not smile like you used to...? Don't kid yourself, sweetheart… Don't make yourself hurt inside any more than you need to. You shouldn't have to live like you do. You deserve much better. _

Kadory walked over to her mother and tilted her head, hair falling into her face and caressing her cheek, "You all right, Mum?" Kadory asked quietly, looking at her foster-mother quizzically. _How does she see me in her eyes? Does she still see the foolish young girl I was before? The young girl that's not even a part of me anymore…? It's been thirteen years. Thirteen years since I officially decided that I had given up on everyone… given up smiling truly, given up laughing, giving up crying… given up living. _

"I'm fine," Sarai replied quietly, looking down at the fowl, "Good job. Your father will be pleased to have something substantial in his stomach other than cabbage and water." Sarai smiled fondly as Kadory went back inside, but the elder stayed put, running a hand through her long, greying hair. How come the world had to be so cruel to her only child left…? How come Kadory had to put up with all the _shit_ she was dealt? And how was she faring internally? How was Kadory's soul still intact?

"_I'm going to have a great big family one day, Mum," the young girl said, now age six. "I'll have a handsome husband, and three little girls. They'll be really cute, too! Do you know what I'll name them?" the young girl looked expectantly up at her foster-mother. _

"_Hmm, I don't know, sweetie," Sarai commented quietly, running a hand through her daughter's silky hair, "What about Emiko? That's a pretty name." _

_Kadory shook her head vigorously, "No, I'm going to name them Kyoko, Rei, Saki!" _

_Sarai smiled gently, "Those are beautiful names, Kadory. What will your husband's name be?" _

"_Hisao," Kadory said firmly, nodding her head, "His name will be Hisao, and he'll have brown hair and will be very tall." _

_Sarai smiled gently and kissed the top of the young neko's head, "He sounds very handsome. Now run along and play while I make dinner." _

"_Okay, Mum!" _

Sarai frowned as she remembered this. How come Kadory couldn't be like she was before? Had the dreams of the three nonexistent Kyoko, Rei, and Saki left her forever? Shaking her head, Sarai sighed. Sometimes things changed… and no matter how badly Sarai wanted Kadory to have a better life, she couldn't change anything. And sometimes happiness just wasn't accessible to some. But Sarai knew one thing: she'd give her life to see her foster daughter smile, just one more time.


	3. Undoable Regrets

[ DISCLAIMER: This chapter contains characters from the anime/manga show RUROUNI KENSHIN. I do NOT own any characters that are used in this chapter. All credit for any characters used/mentioned goes to the creators of Rurouni Kenshin. ]

Loneliness had been all she had ever known. The raven-haired neko had always been alone. Even when Sarai and Kyrro had taken her in, she realized now it'd still been a lonely existence. None of the village children played with her—they refused to, and even those that tried were scolded and sometimes even punished for daring to associate themselves with her. It was like she was a deadly, incurable disease. Kadory wished her parents and clan members had not been cold-heartedly murdered. She could be married, or simply just in love, by now. And best of all, she wouldn't be the only neko in her village. Everyone would be like her; she wouldn't be an outcast. She'd be treated like a normal woman. She could live happily, get married, have children, and watch them grow into the next clan leaders. Everything would fall into place the way the God who created everything planned it.

So why, then, did he make things go like they did? Why did he let her parents be murdered? Why did he let her wander for almost two entire days without the protection, warmth, and satisfaction of food and water? How cruel and merciless could one god be? How come everything had played out the way it had? Kadory was going to forever be persecuted and misjudged and hated, simply because of one physical 'deformity'—and to her, it wasn't even a deformity; it had been normal where she had come from. Rural parts of Japan tended to be the hiding places of the nekos. And the word "hiding" in 'hiding place' is definitely not used loosely. They were hiding from persecution, from impending death, from the outside world. Kadory's clan had been one clan that had not feared men—they had always been prepared for battles, and had often beaten off the men who thought they could play god and destroy the 'unworthy _creatures_' called nekos.

Labeled and hated. That's all Kadory had ever been, all she ever would be.

But no.

Wait.

Hold on a second.

It wasn't true anymore! She had found someone who had loved her. Yet, Kadory realized with a sudden shock of horror, she'd destroyed it. Take a building block from a relationship off the top, and it can be repaired with apologies and kind gestures. Take one off the bottom…

All of Kadory's relationships worked like that: one step forward, two steps back. She'd always had trouble with people. The only people she ever got along with were Sarai and Kyrro. But in this instance, did her foster parents even count? Of course _they_ loved her. They'd lived with her for eighteen entire years. But everyone else… Everyone else hated her, of course. From the moment the redheaded assassin had almost killed her parents, up until that point, she'd been hated. She always _would_ be hated. Now that she reflected on it, however, Kadory realized how badly she'd screwed up. Kenshin _had_ loved her. So why had Hisoka…?

Kadory knew why. She realized now she'd always known why. He was a power-hungry bastard. _That's_ why. He'd set everything up just to tear it down in the most _magnificent_ of ways. How cruel did one person get? Kadory had always thought gods were merciless and unloving, but when she finally figured Hisoka out, she realized that it obviously wasn't only the gods who acted like stuck-up assholes. Kadory knew she'd never get back what she had. She even remembered… when her mother had talked to her about it. She'd obviously fallen in love and didn't know how to deal with it, but Sarai had always been there for her. With Sarai's help, it had been possible for Kadory to tell Kenshin, eventually, how she felt. Yet it all came crumbling in. Unbearable. Unfixable.

"_You've held back your emotions for so long, sweetie," the pepper-haired old woman commented. However, the old woman refused to make eye contact with her adopted daughter. "You've always told me that you don't 'need' anybody other than your father and I. I appreciate your love for us, but you know you don't have to lie to us to make us feel better. In all reality, Kadory, it doesn't make us feel any better—well, it doesn't make _me _feel any better, at least. I want you to be genuinely happy. I've seen you smile more these days because of that Kenshin boy. He's good for you, Kadory. I can tell you've taken a shine to him." _

"_Mum, I'd never lie to you and Papa. You _know_ that…" _

"_You ought to tell him how you feel before it's too late. Good things don't last forever, dear," finally, the blazing-green-eyed woman turned to look Kadory in the eyes. "I would know. I've lost two of my children. It's not anything like this, really… but at the same time it is. You'll lose something you love just like I did, if you don't _do_ something about it." _

"_But Mum, you _couldn't_ do anything about it! You tried, I'm sure, but you couldn't save them from cholera!" _

_Sarai blinked a moment. She'd known her adopted daughter could be blunt, but this was blunt enough to the point it was unnecessary. Sarai sighed thickly and closed her eyes, turning her head away. "It was unavoidable," she whispered. "I know I couldn't do anything. That's what makes it more different. That's what makes it harder. But you _can_ prevent yourself from losing this love." With that, the old woman walked away, leaving Kadory in silence, regretting what she'd said. _

Kadory shook her head.

"It's true, Mum," she murmured to herself, "It's true. I did…find love. But I didn't do what you told me to do. I let it slip through my fingers, and now I'm paying for it." Kadory sighed and shook her head, keeping oncoming tears at bay. She couldn't cry. She couldn't be weak. She'd lived eighteen years dealing with this, and hiding her emotions. _Eighteen years!_ She wasn't about to throw it away now.

It was over. Done. Finished.

Actions have consequences, and Kadory was finally ready to accept those consequences.


	4. Silence

How Sarai managed to fall for him, and how she managed to get here, was beyond the elderly woman's imagination. She didn't understand any of it, really. All she knew was that she was happier with him than she'd been her entire life. But of course, good things never last.

The pepper-haired female sighed thickly as she watched her adopted daughter, Kadory, walk outside and go off to do whatever the young woman did in her free time. Sarai suspected Kadory simply sat by the river than ran near the side of the little village. Kadory seemed to sit there often—too often, if you asked Sarai. Kadory was nothing like her other children, though. Both of her children had been taken by cholera at a young age, and Sarai was helpless to it. All she could do was try her hardest, and for whatever she couldn't do, and whatever she'd done, she'd just had to sit and watch. Sit, watch, pray. Of course, it wasn't only a hard time on the older woman, but her husband, as well. Sarai tended to avoid the subject, though, and hadn't ever known—or planned on knowing—the full extent of her husband's pain.

Though that had happened long ago, the memories still haunted Sarai to the point there was rarely a day that passed where the smiling faces of her children didn't pop up in her mind at least once. After so much nurturing, so much love, so much laughter…after seeing the promising futures both of the youngsters had… Life was cruel. Sarai was somewhat thankful that her foster daughter knew that life was cruel. They understood each other on some levels, but in those levels, there was silence. It was the simple glance or the simple smile. No words were ever exchanged about their suffering, though Kadory's ongoing suffering showed through her everyday interactions with both of her foster-parents.

Kadory refused to help, but with every little movement, Sarai picked out a single cry for help, hidden away. Her daughter had a way of acting tough, but Sarai knew that, on the inside, Kadory was like any ordinary woman: wanting companionship, love, a family of her own. The poor child had given up on all of that a long, long time ago, though, and Sarai had noticed that a long, long time ago. Despite Kadory's suffering, Sarai paid little attention to it some days.

The little family of three barely had enough food every night, and Sarai constantly tried to find something other than cabbage to serve for dinner, but neither her husband nor daughter complained, and sometimes, just for her own sake, Sarai ignored it and pretended that it wasn't so bad, the cabbage and water. Frowning, Sarai wondered what her daughter would do when Kyrro and she passed on.

The girl's self-esteem was rock-bottom already. Sarai wouldn't be surprised if she hadn't any self-esteem at all. Esteem, in this world, seemed almost nonexistent. Kadory wasn't respected, approved of, and was constantly judged. The young woman, now old enough to move away from home, had never known anything but suffering—besides, perhaps, the two short years she'd had when she was a baby, but Sarai didn't know if Kadory remembered anything besides her family's death.

Sighing, Sarai turned her head away, looking back into the scarcely decorated room she was in. What _would _happen to Kadory when she died? When Kyrro died? How would her daughter cope? Perhaps… perhaps Kadory would go on to bigger and better things, but Sarai knew that was the equivalent of asking God to kill one of his own children. Kadory would go on to…to…

Sarai had no idea. But it was likely that nothing would change. There would be what there had always been: silence.


	5. Struggles

**A/N: **This chapter really isn't a memory, like all of the other chapters are. This is more of a random scenario that would be likely to happen to this particular character. It is someowhat based off of a song, but with that being said it is most definitely not just one song. Most of the songs that inspired this are by Three Days Grace, so kudos and credit to them.

**DISCLAIMER: **Characters from the famous manga _Rurouni Kenshin_ are mentioned in this fanfic. I do not own these characters. Kudos & Credit to Nobuhiro Watsuki, creator of the art and storyline of _Rurouni Kenshin_.

* * *

Kadory's eyelids felt heavy. She'd not cried in ages. No, in fact, it'd been many years since Kadory had cried; somewhere around thirteen years ago. She'd been so little then, and her pleasant life had been shattered. Of course she'd always realized the other girls never seemed to act the same way around her as they did when they were by themselves, but it had been on that one fateful evening that Kadory's eyes had been opened to the true terror and hatred of the world. Parents brought up their children in the sensible way: openly reject outsiders. Kadory just happened to fall under the category of 'outsider.' And 'misfit,' 'creature,' 'inhuman beast,' to name a few. Kadory had made for herself an incredibly unhealthy lifestyle, keeping all of her emotions bottled up inside of her, putting on the best facade she could manage, and dropping pretty little white lies where she needed to. In her own eyes, she'd worn down her soul and spirit with years of words plaguing her every thoughts.

"She doesn't belong here."

"She shouldn't have been born, the disgusting creature."

"What a disgusting appearance. How can she live with herself?"

"Someone ought to end her life - it would almost be merciful."

Kadory had heard every insult under the sun, and yet... she'd never let her outward appearance seem bothered by them. But inside, an inferno was raging; it was fueling anger and sorrow and the will to die. However, Kadory had promised herself long ago she had to stay and be with her foster parents, her Mum and Papa, Sarai and Kyrro. She truly loved them. They were the only two people on the face of this planet that really ever cared about her. They loved her, really and truly, and Kadory knew it. She loved them too, and yet she continued to hide most of her life from them. Often it seemed to work, but more often than not, they saw through her disguise. They were just too kind to point out the flaws in her argument, weren't they? They just wanted her to be happy, and didn't want to bring up subjects that they knew would touch on spots where Kadory would blow up at them. Kadory admitted that sometimes her guilt overwhelmed her, and she was on the verge of spilling everything out to her parents, just so she wouldn't have to suffer alone, but...

No matter what, Kadory couldn't wrap her mind around letting another person suffer with her, especially her parents. She wanted them to be happy. She'd often heard them say that they would be happy, if only she would be happy along with them. So Kadory tried - she tried falsely, but she tried, nonetheless. From that point on in her life, her facade had grown. She had become a hollow shell of the young woman she had been before, and even the young child she'd been before that. But Kadory couldn't escape from reality. No, the world she lived in hated her for her differences, and there was _nothing_ she could do that would ever change that. People would always hate her, but she would have to learn to deal with it, sooner or later, or simply end everything. But how could she do that, and leave her parents behind? Had they not already suffered enough with the loss of their two biological children to cholera? No, Kadory could never do that to them. She could never put them through any pain without killing herself internally over it. Letting out a deep sigh, Kadory turned, bi-colored eyes looking over the horizon, her gaze watery, as if on the verge of tears, but none were released.

Another day would come.

And her struggles would start all over again, and she'd face them alone.

Like always.

She was alone.

* * *

**A/N: **Yeah, it's me again. xD I'm sure you're so excited. And it was a tons better in my head... so sorry it came out like a pile of elephant poo on white tile (not sure what that even means). So yeah... go eat a donut or something xD  
But reviews are much appreciated, my loverlies!

PEACE OUT, YO.

~Sulfur


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